FREE MARKET FAIRY TALES

Republican Red Riding Hood

Republican Red Riding Hood's father, the CEO of a multinational chemical & nuclear reprocessing corporation, asked his daughter to deliver a subpoena to her Grandmother. Grandma had been exposed to PCP rich effluent from the chemical plant as well as emissions of Strontium 90 and was trying to get the alleged culprits to pay for her medical expenses.

"She has no proof," snarled Papa, "There are no studies that indicate this form of exposure causes the exact array of symptoms she displays. This is merely a ploy to suck cash from our fine corporation and diminish shareholder value through unsubstantiated and pernicious litigation"

And so Republican Red Riding Hood set off across the toxic waste tip with a primary school built on it as part of the Governments outsourcing of primary education, and passed the prison labour camp where convicted criminals were busy repaying their debt to society by making a profit for large multinationals, in the process learning the true benefits of the protestant work ethic. While passing through a small town she happened upon a homeless old wolf.

"Spare change?" he croaked, holding forth his dirty hat, "My government hand outs don’t cover my $250 a day crack habit". "PARASITE!!" screeched Republican Red Riding Hood, "Get a job!!"

"But lady, I'm a little off if you take my meaning, ever since the federally mandated positive affirmation programmes were cut," he whispered, "I can barely keep my
shit together to beg from hard working taxpayers.” Republican Little Red Riding Hood called 911 on her c- phone. 45 of the nation's finest arrived and promptly beat the wolf to a pulp. "Sorry about the inconvenience Miss Riding Hood," said the police chief, "we have new laws for such people. We have built bigger better prisons and this wolf will be there for a very long time."

"Praise the Lord," said Republican Red Riding Hood, and she went on her merry way.
She arrived at Grandma's house and noticed that the property was in a prime location for a new shopping mall. "I'll have to get power of attorney and put the old biddy in a rest home," she muttered,” this place is a gold mine."

She entered Grandma's house and saw the old woman was not well, "Oh grandmother, how skinny you look."
"My food stamp allowance should be increased", said grandmother.
"That will have to stop, I'm tired of my hard earned tax dollars being squandered on your entitlements," said Republican Red Riding Hood. "And grandmother, how ill you look."
"My Medicare cheques should be increased to a level that matches bloated European social welfare plans,” said grandmother.

“You tax and spend liberal," replied Republican Red Riding Hood, "People like
you make me sick. I don't see why we the taxpayers should have to pay for your outmoded redistributionist policies. Don't you know the Lord will provide?" And with that Republican Red Riding Hood served the subpoena, snatched the title to grandmother's house, and within 24 hours a mega mall was built on the spot.

When the limo delivered Republican Red Riding Hood and her mother to the grand opening they saw thought of grandmother.
"Oh Jesus have mercy on her soul," they both prayed.. Republican Red Ridding Hood cut a cheque to Billy Graham and immediately felt better.

National Ammo Day

This site supports National Ammo Day. For more and more detailed information have a look at the consistantly excellent Kim du Toit.

In outline, in the USA there are proposals in certain States to put a tax on ammunition. It is seen as an underhand method of controlling and limiting access to ammunition by law abiding citizens.

The maths are as follows:
In the US, there are 75 million gun owners
If during Ammo Week there all go & buy 100 rounds of ammo, thats 7.5 billion rounds of ammo in the hands of gun owners

I feel that we should support the idea

Do it.....you know it makes sense..........

Asylum Seekers & Economic Migrants

Here is a little topic the Mrs Free Market & I simply cannot get our collective heads around. No reasonable or sane person can deny that there are some unfortunate people that are forced to flee their homes and sometimes families, to escape persecution. I am of the opinion that we are honour bound and it is incumbent upon us as a Nation, in the great Great British liberal tradition (please note the small ‘l’ in liberal) to give these poor people shelter and protection.

All of that is completely laudable but I am constantly amazed at the “asylum seekers”: launching actions in the High Court because they don’t have wide screen TVs with cable/satellite reception; burning down Reception Centres (at huge cost to the public purse I might add).

So I got round to thinking what my attitude would be if the Family Free Market were forced to flee the UK (something I can see happening looking at the current rate of this country’s decline) in fear of our lives. Imagine that we end up in a safe country and are placed in a reception centre, while our application is processed. Where is the problem? I mean, we are housed, clothed, given three square meals a day & access to medical services – plus most of all, we are SAFE. If these people are genuine, why don’t they behave as such?

Now, moving on from there, why do we have to give asylum to all of these Kosovans, Afghans & Iraqis? We the British taxpaying public have sent our servicemen to free these nations at considerable cost in lives and Exchequer funds. Now they are free they should get on with their lives and get rebuilding their respective countries. The conclusion must be that they are economic migrants.

Lets be straight on this, there is nothing wrong with economic migrants. If you want to come here, get a job and build a new life – great – you are welcome! If you want to fill a job that idle molly-coddled British workers do not want to do – crack on. However lets be honest – if you are coming here to work then work – do not come here demanding housing/social security benefits/free health care until you have contributed to the system.

It boils down to the balance of rights and responsibilities. Posturing advocates are quick to espouse peoples’ rights while being paid bloated hourly rates by the Government’s Legal Aid scheme. We never hear about responsibilities and that comes first. Until you have accepted and embraced your responsibilities, you have no rights. Surely it is a two way thing – well not according to these unpleasant and litigious legal parasites – everyone has rights – unless you are an existing subject of Her Majesty/pay tax in the UK/go about your everyday business without burdening others. In this instance, your sole purpose is to feed money to the rapacious monster that is the immigration/civil rights industry.

Andrew Mellon - Part 2

Time I feel to revisit the late great Andrew Mellon and the effects of his tax cut under Presidents Harding & Coolridge.

Firstly let’s address his base line assumptions. In summary, Mellon believed that as tax rates rise, taxpayers reduced their taxable income by working less and retiring earlier. Seems reasonable, no one is going to burn the midnight oil if it all goes in taxes (Note to Gordon “tax & waste it” Brown – smell the blue mountain on this one).

The effect on companies is similar, they tend to scale back investment plans and spend more time and money on accountants / tax avoidance schemes. (N.B. Anything that puts money in the accountants’ pockets isn’t good).

Mellon knew that high taxes caused the tax base to contract. Now socialists trying to justify their pernicious & punitive taxation regimes are always bleating that tax cuts only benefit the rich. Not so whiney-butts! Take the time to look at IRS data from the 1920s. As taxes were cut for those earning more than US$100,000 p.a. from 60% to 25% the taxes paid by that group of people grew from US$300bn p.a. to US$700bn p.a. The share of taxes paid by that group grew from 1/3 in 1920 to 2/3 in 1929.

Mellon’s tax cuts allowed the US economy to grow strongly between 1922 – 1929. The average annual rate of growth 4.7% p.a. and unemployment fell from 6.7 to 3.2%. As the Cato Institute so correctly states, “The Mellon tax cuts restored incentives to work, save, invest and discouraged the use of tax shelters.”

Arniewatch

So the voters of California have voted for Arnie - laugh? I haven’t laughed so much since Grandma died! The only thing more amusing that imagining the angst of Californian Democrats is watching the collective gnashing of teeth of the liberal-left British media.

Rarely has the BBC (“Bolshevik Broadcasting Corporation”) been so swift to condemn someone. So readers, I’d like to leave you with this thought:

Bill Clinton – reputed to be highly intelligent, a World statesman and professional politician. What will he be remember for ? (Rhetorical…)

Ronald Reagan – actor & former Governor of California. What will he be remembered for? Eeerrrr…….the small matter of winning the Cold War & causing the fall to numerous Communist dictatorships.

I know who Mr & Mrs Free Market would vote for.

The Royal British Legion

Following today's theme of rememberance, here is a little bit about our 'veterans organisation'.......

"The Royal British Legion is the leading ex-Service charity protecting the welfare, interests and memory of ex-Service people and their families and dependants.

2001 was its 80 th anniversary year. It was founded in 1921.

13 million people in the UK are eligible to ask for its help – 5.5 million ex-Service people and 7.5 million dependants. (i.e. one in five people or 20 per cent of the population).

The Legion is almost the UK 's largest membership organisation, with 519,000 members (including the Women's Section this total is 589,000).

People as young as 17.5 years can be sent on active service, so veterans are often much younger than people realise.

There has only been one year (1968) since the Second World War when a British Service person hasn't been killed on active service.

Each year the Legion answers 300,000 calls for help to its helpline, Legionline.

The Legion will be needed for as long as people continue to be affected by conflict. It doesn't advocate war but is simply there to support those who have been prepared to make a personal sacrifice through serving in the British Armed Forces.

The Poppy Appeal raised over £21.1 million in 2002.

In 2002 the Legion spent over £50 million on its work.

70% of the 61 Poppy Factory workers are disabled or suffer from chronic illness. The Factory was designed to offer jobs to such people and its remit remains the same today.

300,000 staff and volunteers organise the Poppy Appeal each year
More than 38 million poppies, 98,000 wreaths and sprays, 730,000 Remembrance Crosses and other Remembrance items will be made at the Poppy Factory in Richmond , Surrey , this year."

My Personal Act of Rememberance

As we approach this years Rememberance Sunday, I thought I'd post a little note about the late John Foster (Para Regt).

John was my friend & 'buddy' i.e. within the fireteam, my other half. He was always there, no matter how chinstrapped we were, with a brew & a smoke. No matter how cold & wet we were he could make us all laugh and keep going for the next mile. He was always a sight first thing in the morning. He still be in his bivvy bag, with the zip open a crack, smoke billowing out of this tiny hole, as he had the first cigar of the day.

All John ever wanted to be was a paratooper & he died a paratooper, leaving a widow and baby daughter.

Others may have forgotton you, but I haven't

Buying Shares Is No Joke

In these times of volatile bourses, investors are increasingly looking for alternative investments. I would like to remind you of an anecdote that is attributed to Alan Greenspan, who by any measure is probably the most respected central banker since Andrew Mellon (see previous posts).

One Monday morning an investor calls his broker and instructs him to purchase $100,000 of stock in a little known company, ABC Plc, which is traded on an obscure index. The next morning he opens his Wall Street Journal and sees that shares in ABC went up 10% during the previous days trading.

Thinking that he is on to a good thing, he calls up his broker and buys a further $100,000 tranche of ABC shares. Opening his paper on Wednesday morning, he sees that ABC stock has gone up a further 10% and encouraged by the previous two days gains he buys another $100,000 of ABC.

So comes Thursday and once more he opens his paper and once more, the stock has climbed 10% in value. However, being ever cautious and mindful that these rises cannot go on forever the investor decides to realise his profit and sell his shares. So he calls up his broker and instructs him to sell. The broker replies,
“To who?”

Now the moral of this isn’t don’t buy shares, it is when you have invested in something that has gone wrong, don’t go trying to sue everyone. No one made you buy the shares in the first place and if you actually believed what the analysts wrote, more fool you.

“Caveat emptor”
Let the buyer beware

Consultants - Scum of the Earth

A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of the dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Broni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the shepherd: "If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in the flock, will you give me one?"

The shepherd looked at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looked at his flock and calmly answered: "Sure."

The yuppie parked his car, whipped out his IBM Thinkpad and connected it to a cell phone, then he surfed to a NASA page on the internet where he called up a GPS satellite navigation system, scanned the area, and then opened up a database and an Excel spreadsheet with complex formulas. He sent an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, received a response. Finally, he prints out a 150 page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized printer turns to the shepherd and says: "You have exactly 1586 sheep".

"That is correct; take one of the sheep," said the shepherd. He watches the young man select one of the animals and bundle it into his car. Then the shepherd says: "If I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my sheep?"

"OK, why not?" answered the young man.

"Clearly, you are a consultant", said the shepherd.

"That's correct", says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

"No guessing required", answers the shepherd. "You turned up here, uninvited. You want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked, and to top that, you don't know crap about my business. Now, give me back my dog..."