MPs have threatened to defy an official inquiry into the Commons expenses scandal led by Sir Thomas Legg by refusing “unfair” demands to repay questionable claims.

Independent auditors will on Monday write to up to 500 past and present MPs to highlight concern about their use of parliamentary allowances, before inviting them to refund the public purse. But in an astonishing act of defiance, a spokesman for the MPs complained that many would not accept orders to repay claims which were approved by the Commons fees office.

If you are going to get fined £1,000 for stuffing body parts of the environmental lobby into the wrong wheelie bin (see posts passim), there is absolutely no reason why you don’t go the full nine yards & also get fined for throwing the heads of rapaciously greedy MPs into the pig swill bucket.

The irony is that this second fine wouldn’t be for actually killing & feeding MPs to the pigs – a better fate than the Westminster Village pondlife deserve – in doing so, you would have broken DEFRA regulations because among so many other things, they have banned pig swill as well.

There are also those of you out there that would hold that feeding the body politic to the pigs could constitute an offense under animal welfare regulations, but as we know down in these yerrr parrrts, pigs will eat absolutely anything & it’s a very good way of getting rid of corpses. How we know this, we aren’t saying, even under caution