The Stern Report – Part 2: Family Free Market makes lifestyle changes
Spurred on by the recommendations of yesterday’s Stern Report, we have decided to make at least one change to the way we live – yes, because of errrrrrrrrr rising sea levels causing increased levels of adolescent mortality among armadillos (really … a man with a beard told me so) we have decided to get rid of Disco Dave the 1st: hence this conversation occurred yesterday
“Hello there, mindful of the damage that 4x4s caused to the planet, are any of your products carbon neutral?”
“No sir, our entire range burn holes in the ozone layer quicker than a blow torch through Gordon Browns uncompetitive economic policies. We recommend that our customers buy some sun block”
“Oh, & what about immediate physical damage to the environment?”
“At 2 tonnes, tectonic plates shift as you drive over Sites of Special Scientific Interest”
“& fuel consumption?”
“Oh that … lets just say that you will be personally responsible for President Bush’s next invasion of an oil rich county. While you are asking, the wood trim on the dash & door panels comes from irreplaceable virgin forest. For the seats, we only use leather from the sweetest looking calves. It is hand stitched by forced child labour in Burmese army slave factories”
Ok ok I made that last one up but what the heck, is it wrong to wish? Anyway, to cut a long (& expensive story short) yesterday, we welcomed the latest addition to Family FM …
Disco Dave the 2nd ... "Sod the planet, it will see me out"
Comments
That my friend is a sweet ride.
Posted by: Lurch | November 1, 2006 10:06 AM
How is it's rabbit chasing potential?
Posted by: nbc | November 1, 2006 11:11 AM
Nice motor indeed and likely to boost my Exxon shares very nicely just in time for christmas; thank you.
A slight quibble though, if I may.
One does hope that you, as a right thinking bulldog of the correct sort, will be replacing the offensive eu branded number plates with ones that reflect true Englishness.
Posted by: The Remittance Man | November 1, 2006 11:15 AM
Both Disco Dave 2 & Larry Landrover 3 came with dealer supplied plates - the EU-junk is going where it truely belongs, in the bin & they are going to be replaced with proper bulldog plates
Posted by: Mr Free Market | November 1, 2006 11:32 AM
which engine have you gone for?
Posted by: dearieme | November 1, 2006 6:12 PM
Fine choice, there's something about a Range Rover. That one must have cost you roughly the same as my house did. You must be doing something right.
The older Range Rovers I've owned have left me with an instrument scanning technique which would shame a 1940's airline pilot attempting a difficult approach in an ailing DC-3.
It goes :- Oil pressure, Temperature, Ammeter, Fuel quantity and "what the hell does that orange light which just came on mean ?"
Happy motoring anyway, kill an ozone layer for me :-)
Posted by: HSLD | November 2, 2006 2:40 AM
The motor is the TD6 2.5L turbo diesel - & thus far, it goes very very well. Time will tell, a bit like HSLDs comment ....
on our old Disco, we had a standing joke that sometimes you would turn it on & you would see an array of warning lights in a combi that you had never ever seen before. Usually, if you turned it off, gave it a couple of minutes, then the systems would re-set itself.
As we always maintain, you shouldn't have a Landrover if you dont have a sense of humour!!!
Posted by: Mr Free Market | November 2, 2006 11:41 AM
2.5 mini-liters? My wife's toy Z3 sports 2.8 silli-liters. My daily drive truck sucks and spits 5.6 liters through it's four cycles. You need an American car to truly screw the environment.
Posted by: Marc | November 5, 2006 6:52 AM